Scoliosis: A night of insomnia and adoption thoughts

Slightly off topic here for a Scoliosis blog but hey I have other stuff going on in my life which does not involve Scoliosis so I might as well share that too!

Welcome to CupCake and her first post, nice of you to share your thoughts with us and a pleasure to write alongside you - XX

I have been tossing and turning so far all night and it is now 3am so I decided to get up and blog!!!!

I am not sure why I cannot sleep, it happens every now and then, to all the insomniacs out there, I sympathise with you, I really do.

I have a busy day ahead of me tomorrow and an early start so the last thing I need right now is to be blogging, I should be asleep!

The adoption must be keeping me awake even though I am trying not to think about it, however, all the paperwork is dragging me down and we are going covering ground we have already trodden on, our adoption agency "forgot" to ask us for CRB checks from Spain so our paperwork has been delayed, due to this delay previous papers that had been prepared and paid for have now expired and have to be paid again - do I look like a walking pound note all of a sudden????

Adopting from a foreign country is hard enough without incompetence being thrown into the mix, it is confusing, soul destroying, damn right dis-heartening and the only people you can rely on for help are the various support groups out there.

All that keeps me going is the thought that one day in the distant future it will all turn out OK and a child will come home to us, in the meantime though we have to sit and wait and wonder, not being a very patient person it can sometimes drive me a bit do-lally. Just knowing there are children right now who could really do with a loving home and here we are waiting with a loving home to provide..............yet we are powerless to help :(

We have thought about looking for a family who right now are considering placing the child for adoption or placing the child into care, but where do we start, we see it on the TV all the time, but does this kind of thing really happen in real life or is it just for the TV, it seems to be popular in the USA where a family who do not wish to keep their child select a family to place the child with, why can't there be someone out there like that for us?

We started our adoption journey towards China in January 2007. We had our initial interview in Reading and then decided to proceed with the terms the adoption agency set out. Our home study began in our home in the UK in May 2007, that was hard going, confusing, frustrating and taught us a few points about our personalities that we didn't know were there, that part of the process was interesting if anything else, not sure I would want to do it all again though! Home work after some 16 years of working was pretty hard going!!!

After the home study we had a few medical nightmares and arguments with our adoption agency over a mole ------------ yes a MOLE, I had one removed from my right shoulder in the summer of 2007, the mole was fine as it was tested for Cancer but bceause the Dr didn't like the look of it, she had it wipped off, nothing major but the adoption agency were certain I had Cancer, this was very upsetting and I wish I had covered it up, a load of fuss over nothing, my Dr even confirmed I was clear and no Cancer was found, she even called the adoption agencies' Dr, this took a while to clear up and in the meantime the months roll by and no movement with the dossier is forthcoming.

Finally the mole issues is cleared up with the adoption agency insisiting that a letter go to China with our dossier explaining what they think about the mole...........great! something for the Chinese to worry about when there is nothing even there, I wonder how that will come out when it has been translated,,,,,,,,,no doubt -------------- "lost in translation!!"

So, we can now go to panel, off we went to Reading on the 3rd October 2007 with all the family, nervous as hell, the adoption process via the UK has to be the most scary moment of my life (apart from Scoliosis surgery but I was only 12 so I don't have really vivid memories of it!), I remember having sweaty palms, heart flutters and moments of wanting to cry while we waited in the little waiting room for our name to be called. 15 people were sat around a very large table, with us at the bottom next to our social worker, I have never been so quiet - EVER!

A few questions later and some nods from me and my better half and we were free to go, we then go back into the waiting room and sit there with baited breath, you have to wait for your acceptance letter via mail but before you leave they do give you some idea of what the outcome is most likely to be. The panel came back with a YES, YES you are approved to adopt a child from China, I think my heart stopped for a brief moment before it all really sank in, then the tears started! LOL

A few days later our formal acceptance arrived and we had a unanimous vote from 15 people, that was a result we were not expecting but extremely pleased that 15 individual people felt we were suitable to adopt a child from a foreign country.

That pretty much brings us to date, there have been some trials and tribulations in between all that but I had to cut it down to size, we have been on this longgggggggg and windyyyyyyy road since Janaury 2007 and our dossier is still sitting in London waiting to be sent, I know there are other families out there waiting for papers to arrive or be sent or even waiting for that phone/email telling you which child has been allocated to your family and I wish them all the best but right now I had to spit out what was stopping me from sleeping and now I have blogged about what was on my chest I feel a lot better.

I am tired, weary and scared!

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